Why We’re Afraid of Change: How Fear Shapes Our Lives

Dwelling in the dark is one the reasons why we’re afraid of change. | Photo by Ross Findon on Unsplash

Change is a natural part of life, yet many of us feel an overwhelming fear of it. This fear often seems irrational, but its roots lie in the unrecognized flaw of evolution. Our ancestors survived by sticking to what was familiar—familiar places, routines, and social structures. The unrecognized flaw of evolution was that our brains developed to prioritize certainty over uncertainty. In uncertain situations where there was potential danger, our ancestors avoided risk. After all, it’s a way to survive.

Today, that same instinct often keeps us from embracing change. We fear the unknown and cling to what feels safe, even when it no longer serves us. Understanding why we’re afraid of change is essential for personal growth and progress.

Chet Shupe’s Rediscovering the Wisdom of Human Nature gives us thought-provoking that could help us better understand human nature, which basically includes our adaptability to changes.

Understanding Why We’re Afraid of Change

The Role of Evolutionary Instincts

Our fear of change is deeply tied to evolution. Our ancestors survived by sticking to what they knew—familiar routines and environments. They faced risks in unfamiliar or uncertain situations, so their brains developed mechanisms to avoid anything unpredictable. Human nature has changed, but not entirely in this aspect.

Today, this instinct still influences our reactions. This is something that we inherit from them. We perceive uncertainty as a threat. It is because, in most cases, uncertainty is synonymous with anxiety and discomfort. This made humans resistant to change. Understanding why we’re afraid of change is a significant step in helping us recognize why we often struggle to embrace new experiences. This evolutionary tendency to seek safety in the known often holds us back from growth and progress, even when change could lead to better outcomes.

Fear of the Unknown and Loss of Control

“The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and strongest kind of fear is fear of the unknown” H.P. Lovecraft.


The adage suggests that fear of the unknown has been there since time immemorial, stating it was the oldest.  A big part of our fear of change comes from the fear of the unknown. Humans have a natural need for control, and why we’re afraid of change disrupts that control. When we face something unfamiliar, our brains tend to fill in the gaps with worst-case scenarios. As a result, anxiety and uncertainty arise. We worry about what we can’t predict, leading to feelings of vulnerability and powerlessness.

Whether it’s a career shift, relocation, or personal growth and transformation, the unknown feels overwhelming. But that’s the way it is supposed to make us feel. Experiencing or trying things for the very first time is uncomfortable and scary. But these very feelings make us cling to what’s familiar, even when it no longer serves us better.

This desire for certainty keeps us stuck, as stepping into the unknown feels far riskier than staying with what’s known. Understanding this fear helps us recognize the patterns that hold us back and encourages us to embrace uncertainty with greater confidence.

Psychological and Social Conditioning

Another factor of our fears is internal (psychological) and external (social conditioning). In other words, this type of fear can be “you vs. you” or “you vs. the society.” We become fearful to embrace change because of the limitations we have on ourselves. We want to take risks, but we don’t give even the benefit of the doubt. On the other hand, we fear change because, over time, we are shaped by the messages we receive from society. We adhere to the societal norms, traditions, and predictability of things because society tells us that it is safer. Social structures and media frequently portray change as risky and uncertain, amplifying the belief that stepping into the unknown is dangerous.

These narratives contribute to why we’re afraid of change—we fear failure, judgment, and rejection. This creates a cycle of resistance, where we avoid growth out of fear of what’s uncertain. Understanding why we’re afraid of change empowers us to challenge these societal beliefs and embrace new opportunities, ultimately leading to personal growth and transformation.

They say, “When it feels scary to jump, that is exactly when you jump.” But when is the right to jump? How will you know the best time to take risks and accept change fully? Do you want to know more about the dynamics of human nature? Grab a copy of Rediscovering the Wisdom of Human Nature by Chet Shupe. Get it here! 

Emotion – The Key to Living in a Truly Real World

Photo by stem.T4L

Some of us have probably heard it many times before: Don’t believe anything you read on social media.

This isn’t just about misinformation like fake news. This is about everything from how pictures on Instagram are prettified and edited to the way various social media ‘influencers’ have been caught up in fraud.

Our world is drowning further in more of that fakery with many of us losing ourselves to virtual realities rather than the reality right in front of us.

Those who have the human nature wisdom for self-discovery are quick to pick up on this and be wary. It’s really sad to see the younger generation make jokes about ‘touching grass’ even as their elders implore them to reconnect with the feeling of real, green grass at their feet.

This isn’t a problem of gaps between generations. It’s a much older problem created by civilization itself. Civilization has long created this virtual world of overly rationalized structures at the expense of living in a truly real world.

A truly real world is an emotional one in tune with nature itself.

Emotions Are The Truer Part of Human Experience

As a social species, human beings are at their most natural when they are in tune with their emotions rather than their intellect.

It was our emotions that allowed us to live without any need of a civic system. By focusing on what feels good rather than detached logic, our ancestors needed only the Law of Life to establish thriving communities that rewarded everyone with love rather than spiritually empty materialism.

Our emotions also keep us aware of our interdependence on others rather than on soulless systems that encourage loneliness and construct human beings as purely self-interested beings.

Rationality Draws Attention to Structures, Not People

Photo by Single.Earth

The false reality presented by civilization is also very evident in the sciences. Many praise the advances and technologies they have brought about but ignore the steep price we’ve paid for them. We have reduced nature into mere quantities to be exploited. Our so-called ‘best minds’ reduce the universe into a dull, joyless husk comprised of models and numbers.

It is only through emotion that we start living in a truly real world where such things hardly scratch the surface of truth. Emotion and spirit are what let us reconnect with nature and realize that nature is not ours to control.

We seek new subatomic particles to validate current theories, yet hardly any of those bring us closer to ending human suffering or ensuring our species’ survival. All they present are structures and constructs, not the real, human souls living in them and existing at the present moment.

The wisdom of true human nature is living in a truly real world where we realize that the answers we seek are already in front of us. Why waste so much effort trying to artificially and intellectually replicate something nature has already provided? So far, all that seems to promise is to remind us of all of what we are already supposed to know!

A Truly Real World is Natural and Emotional

Photo by Catherine Kay Greenup

Many proclaim to know the difference between reality and some virtual simulation of it, but do they really? If their version of reality is still comprised of systems and structures that deny emotions, force us to suppress them and de-naturalize our definition of success, then that version is just as artificial.

Living in a truly real world can certainly start by disconnecting from the false ones on social media and the many screens dominating our lives. However, there is more work to be done! We need to reconnect with the emotions that should have been the true source of our wisdom. We need to stop obsessing with the limited structures of language and the constant pursuit of foresight. It is time to live in the real world that is already with us at the present moment, with what remnants of nature we still have.

If you want to learn more about the wisdom that comes with reconnecting with emotions and the natural world around you, then feel free to also check out Rediscovering the Wisdom of Human Nature on Amazon.